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Old 08-06-2009, 07:57 PM   #1
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Default PCOS Twice as Prevalent in Lesbians

Hello Lavender sisters,

I was intrigued by one of the earlier posts and it looks like at least preliminary research shows an increased prevalence among lesbians. Here's the link that talks about the study:


For me, my recent PCOS diagnosis has been intimately linked to my sexuality and sexual identity. With symptoms encompassing things like weight gain, excess hair growth where society says women shouldn't have hair and loss where we should, fluctuating hormones impacting libido and mood, and infertility/fertility....I expected to find more posts on the topic of feeling a disconnect from femininity. I'm feeling this way. Anyone else out there?

As for me, I'm a happily married lesbian and until recently considered myself "femme"...a lipstick lesbian. I'm not retiring the lipstick now but it's my "butch" partner who's pregnant and I find myself condemned to birth control pills for life simultaneously...oh the irony! I'm trying to integrate this new concept of my androgen-centric body with my own concept of femininity.

I know I should feel grateful that we have two uteruses and thus our chances to conceive are doubled and yet right now I'm mostly feeling jealous that she has a better shot at issue-free conception as I'm the one who's wanted kids since I was 12.

Anyone else out there negotiating fertility issues with another female partner?
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Old 08-30-2009, 12:07 AM   #2
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Location: New Brunswick, Canada
Posts: 3,536

Hi Shoshannah, and welcome!

I can tell that I haven't spent much time on the boards, lately - I'm finding some really old posts! lol

There ARE a lot of women who feel disconnected from their femininity - those posts are not limited to Lavender Cysters, but are spread out all across the boards. I think part of that is the socialized "ideal" of what a woman should be, and it's still centered on some 1950's ideas of the "June Cleaver" image. We don't wear pearls and high heels while cleaning the house anymore, and most of us have the "working woman" image merged in, too, but there's still a lot of pressure that's placed on us, especially with all of the media images we're bombarded with!

As for being "condemned to birth control pill for life" - that's not true. In fact, long-term use of BCP's has been connected to worsening of the underlying Insulin Resistance that is the main factor in triggering PCOS. Since doctors and scientists have figured out that connection (about 6 or 7 years ago, now), the focus is on treating the underlying metabolic issue, and that has been much more effective, long-term. In fact, it is the only form of treatment that reduces the risk of developing the more serious medical complications of PCOS, like high cholesterol, high blood pressure and diabetes!

Many women find that by making some basic lifestyle changes and perhaps taking Metformin that they are able to not only re-gain their cycles and become more fertile again, but are also able to then lose excess weight and improve their health over-all. Even when it's not enough on it's own, it still helps fertility meds do their job better. Between 85 - 90% of women with PCOS WILL become pregnant with some level of assistance, so don't give up! In fact, once you get the IR under control and get ovulating again, you then have almost the same chance of becoming pregnant as the "average" woman!

As for negotiating with a female partner - unfortunately, I can't help you with that one. Know that you're not alone, though! There are lots of other lesbian couples who are experiencing infertility. Don't be afraid to check out your local infertility group - you might be surprised at the support you can receive.

Hang in there! (((HUGS)))
Registered Massage Therapist
2200-hour program in Canada
Focus on women's health and managing chronic health issues

DS (1992)
Diagnosed PCOS 1994
Cannot tolerate BCP
No treatment for 12 years
Now, Metformin 1,500 mg/day, Fish Oil, D3, good multi
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Old 09-08-2009, 08:59 PM   #3
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Hello Shoshannah
I am also femme. I refuse to give up the lip stick and heels. I was diagnosed about 5 years ago. I just keep putting on the make up and getting waxed because it makes me feel good and in control if I keep doing what I have always done....Make myself pretty. Good luck.
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Old 12-03-2010, 07:06 PM   #4
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My partner and I arent quite at the baby-making stage yet, but have definately talked about it over the years. My PCOS is obviously a big factor and an interesting challenge. She is on keen on the idea of being pregnant, so it has been decided that I would undergo the IVF treatment. However, there is no guarantee that it will work for me. I have no idea how fertile/infertile I am or will be. There is also the pressure of age. I am assuming that I will have more chance of concieving the younger I am. My partner and I have only just really ventured into our careers (as a police officer and teacher) and both have high expectations, aims and goals career wise. Im not sure how we will fit in and deal with the stress, cost and ... everything while chasing careers and lives.

Yea... good old rant. Thanks. Haha.
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